You Know You're Obsessed With Twilight When
by Karin Ochibi-chan
Summary: We've seen what extreme Twilight haters do, but what about extreme Twilight lovers? Let's take a look, shall we? For SuperJGirl5's birthday! Happy Birthday SuperJGirl5!


You Know You're Obsessed With Twilight When…

**Karin: Hey everyone! I'd like to dedicate this to my friend SuperJGirl5 on fanfiction because it's her birthday today. I hope you enjoy your present, J-chan! **

**As for the other readers, I hope you enjoy this as well and it gives you laughs. **

**Disclaimer: **No owning of Twilight was obtained during the creation of this fic.

* * *

**You Know You're Obsessed With Twilight When….**

#1- You take the book everywhere you go… including the bathroom.

#2- You dream about Edward Cullen in your sleep.

#3- You stay away from the sunlight at all costs afraid you might start to sparkle if so much as a speck of sunlight shines on your person.

#4- You replace yourself with Bella and claim you are Edward Cullen's love muffin.

#5- You are either a Bella/Jacob fan or Bella/Edward fan engaging in a shipping war between which is the better pairing despite the fact that Bella and Edward are already together.

#6- You are checking the official Stephenie Meyer website everyday every hour on the hour to see when the Twilight movie is coming out.

#7- You worship Breaking Dawn as if it were your bible.

#8- You tell your teacher that your vampire instincts made you break their desk.

#9- You attempt to turn your boyfriend/girlfriend into a vampire by trying to bite them when they're not looking so you can spend eternity together.

#10- You go all emo and angsty when you read the part when Edward leaves Bella in New moon.

#11- You forgive Edward despite everything and claim he's done nothing wrong ever. That definitely includes the whole leaving Bella thing making her all depressed and crap.

#12- you believe it is your mission to go around converting people to Twilightism.

#13- You place your worst enemy as a werewolf and you a vampire claiming that that's the reason you'll never get along.

#14- You take your book of Twilight and sleep with it as a teddy bear.

#15- You have your ideal vision of a boyfriend exactly like Edward—even in appearance.

#16- You tell someone that you can see the future and that they will trip and fall to the floor. You follow them around all day making sure it happens since they don't believe you.

#17- You think the hottest guy in your class is a vampire and stalk him all day until he admits it.

#18- You will name your daughter Bella or your son Edward just because they are your favorite character.

#19- You try to read peoples' minds during your free time only to get a major headache and achieve nothing.

#20- You wonder _WHY_ you can't read peoples' minds in the first place.

#21- You form a club for the sole purpose of looking for real life vampires among you.

#22- You tell your parents that you older sibling smells like a werewolf and should be sent to the dog clinic for a bath.

#23- You made up a Twilight theme song and are currently writing a letter to the president requesting he make it the national anthem.

#24- You believe you were only living in a void until Twilight was born into the world.

#25- You actually say to the computer you will do everything on this list as you read along until you are dubbed an actual Twilight obsessed manic.

**Warning:** _if you are experiencing any of these symptoms, it's best if you get help from a therapist or a guidance councilor before you are diagnosed with OTD—Obsessive Twilight Disorder. Some symptoms may include reading Twilight over and over again despite the fact that it's your 172th time reading it, you ignore your studies to concentrate on looking for vampires, and last but not least: tell everyone that Edward Cullen is your future husband. If you are experiencing any of these symptoms along with the list above, please save yourself while you still can. OTD is an incurable disease and there is absolutely no hope for you to be normal again. Have a nice day. _

**...**

**Karin: Phew! There you have it folks! Hope you enjoyed. And once again, Happy Birthday to you SuperJGirl5. Best wishes for your sweet sixteen. Remember, you're still five years away from legally drinking alcohol so don't go overboard (grins and laughs). **

**See ya next time! **


End file.
